But this assumes that both persons desire monogamy, which begs the question; naturally, monogamy-oriented people will desire monogamous relationships, but this doesn't explain the desire for monogamy itself!Of course, desiring a mongamous relationship doesn't need justification, but neither does a desire for any other type of relationship (including not being in a relationship at all, as Bella De Paulo emphasizes on her Living Single blog).(One might even wonder if this would be considered emotional infidelity at all, since your committed partner "relinquished" any claim on your affections.) lover)—is this arrangement fair to him or her?Of course, he or she may agree with it (or have reconciled to it), and there is a sense in which you can accept this as justification.(And if your partner is not aware of the other relationship, then you've brought deception into the mix, either through silence, hiding, and sneaking around, or by outright lying.) Of course, your significant other may not value monogamy, in which case presumably you can be open about your other relationship.Another possibility is that your partner is no longer emotionally committed to the relationship, which is maintained for other reasons, such as children, finances, cultural or religious factors, and so forth.
But now that he is free of the marriage bond he meets some 19 year old girl online and moves her 2 hours from her hometown.In their view, love represents a total devotion of one person—heart, soul, and body—to another, which implies that you can never love a second person without taking something away from the first.But this assumes that whatever you give when you love someone is limited or scarce, so that giving some (or more) to Jane or Joe means giving less to Janet or John.But it seems hard to defend a essentially monogamous nature to love itself without first assuming that lovers want monogamy, which is circular reasoning.